Ever Thankful

There’s much to be thankful for today.

I am thankful for the courage to take risks in the pursuit of happiness. Two life-altering decisions in one year is at least one too many, but I am also thankful for friends who support rather than judge. I’m thankful for all God has blessed upon me and to know His love will never forget me.

I don’t know who will read this, but I am throwing it out because I miss writing. It’s one more thing I’m thankful for despite how I have neglected it in recent months. While I’m being honest, I miss the interaction with others who share their thoughts and words with the world this way.

If I make no promises then I tell no lies. So, I may post again tomorrow; I may not. Happy Thanksgiving even if you’re not celebrating it today. I hope you enjoy time with your friends and families, not shopping.



Happy Mother’s Day You Blood Sucking Parasites

051I bet you already know this is Becca writing from the title.  It does happen to be Mother’s Day weekend.  It also happens to be the weekend that I went to the doctor for an unknown rash on my neck.  Well, really it because I had multiple lymph nodes swollen and I couldn’t figure out why.   I remember when my kids were pre-school-aged.  I was close to one mom who would practically have a panic attack if anyone’s kid got sick.  She would get so mad if someone didn’t tell her that their child had been ill.  Then when her kids would get sick she’d most often “forget” to tell everyone.  I used to get quite the kick out of it.

Nothing makes you feel more like a dumbass than having the doctor pick though your hair like your elementary school nurse did.  I was the one to suggest it though.  I said, “Well, my first thought is I got lice from helping out on a few school field trips.  I didn’t see any, so now I don’t know.”

She said  she would take a look really quick.  After about five minutes of digging though my afro, she asked, “What school do your kids go to?”  When I answered, she said, “You might want to give them a call and let them know your family has lice.”  I swore under my breath, and then thanked God that Web MD was wrong about me dying of cancer.

liceNext, I texted my spouse asking him to start washing sheets and to inform him I wasn’t dying.  I quickly rushed home to kill the blood-sucking parasites residing in my afro and in my daughter’s mane.   Then we sat in the bath tub together combing the nits out for an hour.  I then called my beloved sister to pass along that the de-stressing visit she made to my house may have caused more stress in her life.  Later, I emailed the kid’s school.

During this process, I was laughing about it being Mother’s Day weekend.  What says happy Mother’s Day more than picking the nits out of your kid’s hair?

So happy Mother’s Day to all of you: moms of one or more, stepparents, foster parents, stand-in moms for those whose parents are lacking, aunts, and sisters.  Most of us have been a mom for at least a moment.  Blessings to you all.



Lady or Not… Here I Come!


Jason made a post on my blog this week.  Please take a moment to read and comment.  I would love it! http://wp.me/p2BLLc-YT


I had a wake-up phone call from my sister this morning.  Basically, she needed me to lend my ear to her so that she wouldn’t explode.  She immediately launched into a rant about  her husband’s grandparents hoarding watermelon.  To make a long story short, they wanted to eat an entire watermelon in front of the children and give them none (She was the “friend” I was talking about in this post).


Five of the eight of us. I’m in the red, The sister I am talking about is next to me.

I love all seven of my siblings, even the three I don’t really know.  We’ve all been through the ringer a time or two, but the love is there.  Today, though, I am focusing on the one that has always been in my life; the one that was with me once I was adopted.  Our relationship has been on my mind today.

Parents, other siblings, children, and friends have been in and out of my life; she has remained the constant. She has been by my side from the darkest part of my youth to the brightest part of my adulthood.  She has been hungry with me, she has been hurt alongside me, she has been homeless with me; she knows.  I have held her while she gave birth, and we held onto my mom while she took her last breath.  We have been though thick and thin.

The thing about my sister is that we are so similar and yet so different.  We are biological sisters, but look very different.  She is athletically built without even having to exercise; I am hourglass built and become very round without exercise.  At one point, we were both in size 4.  She was 105 lbs and I was 137 because our bodies are not alike.  She is very conservative and I am very liberal.  I talk a lot and she talks more.    She loves to clean; I don’t.  I love to cook; she doesn’t.  She likes to collect stuff; I collect nothing.

The thing I love about us is that no matter our differences, we love each other.  We have one another’s back.  If she were to rob a bank, I would be there to hold her hand in prison.  She has made countless trips to visit me since I moved away from home, because she loves me.  We are almost like twins.  If one of us is having a problem, the other knows about it without a word or a call.  We support one another.

I have raised my children, daughter (11) and son (9), to be best friends.  I want them to have the same sort of relationship as us.  So far they do.  Of the five beds in this house, they sleep with one another every night.  They take care of each other to the point of ganging up on me (which I approve of).    There is love, and I am proud to say that they understand it by example.

So this is to my sister that loves me, no matter my choices.  That loves me despite disapproving of (while laughing at) my blog.  That loves me because I am me and doesn’t want to change my spirit.  I will love her until the day I die.




Lady or Not… Here I Come!



P.S. Jason wrote his Gentleman or Not post on my blog today. It’s about how you should erase your iPhone before you sell it! Check it out HERE.

F is for…

ImageF is for Friends, of which I’ve had too few, but I treasure the ones who are close to me, in the past, present, or future. F is for Family, which I’ve had and lost and hope to gain again. F is for Fun, which I need some more of. F is for Fiction, which I should write more of. F is for Fomenting Feelings into a Funk, which I need to do less of. F is for accepting Fate and Failing to Fear the Future Any Further.

Friend or Foe

This is Becca from Ladyornot.com.  Jason has graciously asked me to post on his blog once a week in the same manner he writes for me. He wants me to step out of my Lady silly role and write from an authentic place.  He wants you to know me like he knows me. So I may talk religion, politics, food, kids, family, and friendships.  Stepping out of my box is a wonderful challenge and I look forward to the upcoming posts. But today, I am going to write about how Jason and I became so close.

In December of 2011, I had just moved from my home of 12 years to a new city. I had spent the first month and a half here setting up my new home, and reading a crazy amount of Janet Evanovich. Then a dreadful thing happened: I read the entire 18 books of the series and had nothing left to read.  So, I logged into my computer and looked for a blogging site. I had a blogged previously on Blogspot and Cafemom, but the latter is one of those mommy blogs and I wanted to step out of that box. I found a site that was trying very hard to be WordPress, except it fostered community-building and forums as well.  The site welcome suggested a few people to read and Jason happened to be the person they suggested that day.

He had written some long-winded post about teaching that I 100% agreed with, so I left my first comment.  He and I had a wonderful back-and-forth and realized we had a lot in common. They also had a chat feature, so he popped up asking about the weather and I rolled my eyes.  Everyone knows I hate talking about the weather; plus, the last thing I needed was some guy trying to roundabout hit on me.  He tried a few more times but the feature wasn’t working.  He decided to email me. I realized very quickly he wasn’t trying to hit on me.

Soon we exchanged messenger addresses and were joined at the hip.  We had our laptops and would verbally ejaculate all day. I would fuss at him because he would be in the middle of a conversation and wander off mid-thought to go get coffee for an hour. I would tell him how he annoyed the crap out of me. He would tell me I needed to learn to spell and proofread my work.  We would verbally spar more than get along but it was always fun.  His warmth, kindness, and compassion for others always shined through.  He went though a trying divorce and I held his hand. He would occasionally pretend to listen to me.

Because (287x300)Eventually we met and my family adores him.  He is part of my family and I wouldn’t have it any other way.  We have spent much time together both in person and on webcam, etc. When he said he wanted a fresh start to his life, we invited him to come live with us.  We have a great big house and plenty of room.  I look forward to more adventures with this crazy-funny-silly-goofy-squirrelly-adhd-sweet-annoying-lovable-teddy bear.



Lady or Not…. Here I Come!